Remember 80′s South African television on SABC? Back in the day television days on the ‘white’ channels[1] used to alternate between Afrikaans and English; Mondays would start with Afrikaans in the day time and then switch over to English at 6pm, Tuesdays would start English and switch over to Afrikaans at 6pm etc – fucking ridiculous[2].
In that time the funniest thing by far on the boob was a short animated show about a nameless little white line guy on a solid blue background who would walk up and down alternately shouting at or chatting to the bizarre things he encountered. I’m pretty sure that if you grew up in 80′s South Africa you know what I’m talking about; that little line-man with the big nose strutting up and down the line – hillarious.

Up until about a week ago I never knew what its name was (it didn’t really have a title sequence), but I can, to this day, sing the wordless song that introduced mr. line-man[3]. And then someone mentioned in passing that it was available on Youtube, and holy shit was it funny.
It turns out that the name of the show is La Linea and the character is named Mr. Linea. And it is hillarious.

Mr. Linea

The show was created by Italian animator Osvaldo Cavandoli in 1969 and the short (2-3 minutes) episodes he produced throughout the 70′s were broadcast all over the world. Part of the beauty of the show is that the main character speaks a gibberish language which translates to just about anything worldwide.

Mr. Cavandoli

Here are two of my favourite episodes from Youtube.

In which Mr. Linea meets a horse who takes him for a ride.

In which Mr. Linea encounters the boob tube and in it himself.

More than anything the genius in the execution is not about the bizarre plot lines[5], nor was it the insane vocal performances – it’s how elegantly the animator conveys the meaning of Mr. Linea’s day just with gestures – arm waving, pointing, shouting, laughing, pensive moments of silence. Regardless of your age or the language that you speak, you know exactly what Mr. Linea thinks.
There was no better television than this surreal show and it hasn’t aged in the least. Now if only someone would upload some episodes of Wielie Walie to Youtube.

[1] yes, even television channels had Apartheid
[2] though not more so than any of the other ludicrous nation-building enterprises of the 80′s
[3] all together now! Badoo-badoo, badoo-badoo, badoo-badoo
[4] an even better place to get episodes from is the archives of Italian TV5.
[5] which twist and turn and loop back on themselves at will, and invariably end abruptly with the demise of Mr. Linea.

The new hot thing in South Africa is Phuza Thursday. Phuza (pronounced Pooh-za) is the Zulu term for drink and Thursday is the day on which wild South Africans are getting phuza’d.
It all started when radio DJ Gareth Cliff[1] commented on a new thing in Johannesburg where people[2] were spilling the weekend over into Thursday nites – going out and getting hammered.
Jhb is much more of a going-out-every-nite-of-the-week kind of city than Cape Town and probably ranks second only to Stellenbosch[3] in terms of hardcore drinking. Many suspect it is because in Jhb there really isn’t anything to do but braai, go to malls and go out kuiering, and of course you can phuza while doing all three.

Cliff probably coined the phrase as an extension of Woza Weekend[4] itself an extension of Woza Friday – a song by Juluka.
Can’t wait for Woza Weekend, then you may as well have a Phuza Thursday.

The whole Phuza Thursday thing has taken off like a rocket and it has become perfectly acceptable to on a Friday morning complain about a bit of a Phuza Face.
Of course the marketing fraternity are not far behind in picking up on a new vibe and Phuza Thursday on 5FM is now sponsored by Essentiale. Oh, and yes – www.phuzathursday.co.za is already taken.

Well, seeing as how I am a hot, hip and happening kind of dude I did the obvious last nite and went home, opened a soft red blend and a glass and a half later I was under a blanket on the couch enjoying my wild Thursday.
Of course this morning I had a bit of a Phuza Face[5], but somehow it didn’t come up around the watercooler.

Phuza?

[1] There are lots of things I don’t like about Cliff, but he does know radio.
[2] White, urban, mobile – his listeners
[3] Even more white and mobile, but less urban
[4] A popular Friday nite variety TV show from the 90′s which became lingo for friday evening party time
[5] By my standards, at least